Scioly.org

"When you sing French, can you make sure your mouth looks like a fish?"

"You were born to be a whale!"

"[something I couldn't hear]... is a dead book!"
"You're a dead book!"

EDIT:
"Your tongue is the problem!"
"Good, you can do it! You just need to get rid of your tongue!"
"Can you try to sing like a beaver?"
"You just need to learn how to make your jaw go backwards."

If you'd like to know the context: My choir teacher was trying to fix my tone quality.

"You sound like a moist potato!"
"Greeeaaaattt...now I'm going to be up all night trying to think that through."

"Your jeans smell like butterscotch."
"WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?"

"Quit taking his only ball!"
"I'll be glad to put the shoes on, just as soon as they dry. You see, they've just come from the previous user."

"Any slice of cake is a wedge, it's just low efficiency."

"WHY IS THERE A DRAWING OF PIKACHU ON THE BOARD? WHY IS IT CRYING BLOOD?"

I have some strange classmates.

"Ok so we have Iron Man Davy Jones and a land shark"

"Why is the walking walnut sending you on a quest??"

"Welp floating constipated sheep time"

"Jafar is questioning his life choices"

"OK HOW DO YOU MANAGE TO PUT 65 THOUSAND CREDITS INTO THE RIPOFF FLAPPY BIRD MACHINE???"

"It doesn't matter which one of them you marry, pigeon, you can wed all four. You can either be a big fish in a small pond or a, uhhhh, mid-sized fish in a mid-sized pond."