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I trake out the earplugs..
but then i turn into a monster because of the radiation

So i shooot you, but thats nbd b/c i know a voodoo shaman who brings you back to life. The thing is he has decided to take my soul as payment. But I'm clever so I ran away, but then he sent some creepy zombies after me

So I take you and the zombies out to drink and we talk about this very unflattering stereotype that's been created for them. After that, we have a real good time until Godzilla comes in and is all like, "Hey, how come I wasn't invited to this shindig?" And then in a jealous rage he eats all the zombies and is coming after me and you when...

Godzilla got pigeon and began to attack But didn't expect to be blocked by Shaq Who proceeded to open up a can of Shaq-fu When Aaron Carter came out of the blue And he started beating up Shaquille 'o' Neal Then they both got flattened by the batmobile Before it could make it back to the batcave Abraham Lincoln popped out of his grave And took an AK-47 out from under his hat And blew Batman away with a ratatattat But he ran out of bullets and he ran away Because Optimus Prime came to save the day. But suddenly Aaron Carter started singing thus making us bleed out of our ears. (Part of this post is the Ultimate Showdown by Lemon Demon)

Ah, pigeon it. There's no saving us now.

Nope, but Batman does put us out of our misery by killing us with a bat gernade. And then my shaman friend raises us from the dead. Again. But away from Aaron. We then live in Greenland until we are attacked by evil porcupines

I use my physics gun to clip the evil porcupines to the snow-covered ground. Unfortunately, they shed their quills to escape the ground and turn into Teenage Mutant Ninja Porcupines (with headbands to boot). As they close in on us I remember that I had some rodent bait infused with lysergic acid diethylamide (LSD). The TMNP rush toward the bait and eat it, causing them to wander around looking all over the place, saying, "I LIEK PURPEL...PURPEL IS GREEEN AND BLAAAACK". We then run away unharmed, but then out of nowhere followers of the Cult of Cthulu appear and start to cast mythical spells on us.

luckily i called ghostbusters, who got killed while we ran away. a perfect decoy.
but out of nowhere, Monty Python appeared and started to say the funniest joke in the world

So we listened for a little bit. But unbeknownst to us the pigeon Frenchies stole the holy hand gernade and were about to detonate it when...

crazibanana_51 wrote:So we listened for a little bit. But unbeknownst to us the butterfly Frenchies stole the holy hand gernade and were about to detonate it when...

you cant hear the funniest joke in the world without dying....
but anyways, BP spilled oil on them and stopped them. and made a huge environmental disaster.
however, the human torch fell on the oil, and the oil became ablaze.