Scioly Assassination 132: MH370

[LittleMissNyan]

Yay new sassy game

[JoeyC]

What even is this anymore?

[TheChiScientist]

What even is this anymore?

I don't know... Intriguing but I could come up with something more creative.

[JoeyC]

Scioly Assassination 132
Engine Pieces Found: 0
Clues Given: 0
Dead: 0

well I guess I have nothing better to do than this....

[UTF-8 U+6211 U+662F]

Scioly Assassination 132
Engine Pieces Found: 0
Clues Given: 0
Dead: 0

well I guess I have nothing better to do than this....

As a former Assassinator, I approve of this message.

[Assassinator]

---MH370 Black Box No. 1---
January First 2019.
12:01 AM
Water Landing.

Overhead Announcement #100418

Stay Calm.
Our Journey is not yet done.
Cell phones and Telephone are inoperable.
An error has occured in our navigation system.
Life Preservers are located underneath your seats.

Of course the name Life Preserver is an irony because for one of you yours is rigged to blow.
However, don't think I couldn't easily put my target on ice with my own hands. I am not standing still; I am lying in wait.
---End---

Rules for Round 1:
1. Up to three protects may be made
2. Anyone may make protects
3. If the target attempts to protect someone but is not himself protected both the person he protected and himself will die (because the vest will explode)
4. nffhzcgvbaf znqr bss bs gur ehyrf ner fxrgpul fb qbag hfr nalguvat abg va gur znva pyhr frtzrag rnpu ebhaq gurer'f n rkgen ehyr rapbqrq gb znxr vg rnfvre sbe lbh

[waffletree]

Stay Calm.
Our Journey is not yet done.
Cell phones and Telephone are inoperable.
An error has occured in our navigation system.
Life Preservers are located underneath your seats.

From SoCal?
The capitalized Telephone may refer to someone who posts in the posting game Telephone?
so someone from socal and is active in Telephone = DragonTownEpic? maybe?

[JoeyC]

3. If the target attempts to protect someone but is not himself protected both the person he protected and himself will die (because the vest will explode)

DragonTownEpic's a he too right?

[Name]

4. nffhzcgvbaf znqr bss bs gur ehyrf ner fxrgpul fb qbag hfr nalguvat abg va gur znva pyhr frtzrag rnpu ebhaq gurer'f n rkgen ehyr rapbqrq gb znxr vg rnfvre sbe lbh

Assumptions made off of the rules are sketchy so dont use anything not in the main clue segment each round there's a extra rule encoded to make it easier for you
wait lol im stupid its a rot 13 caeser shift. Also why is a a apostrophe included in there's but all other punctuation is omitted?

[kate!]

However, don't think I couldn't easily put my target on ice with my own hands. I am not standing still; I am lying in wait.

This second sentence is a Hamilton lyric. From the song Wait for It.

4. nffhzcgvbaf znqr bss bs gur ehyrf ner fxrgpul fb qbag hfr nalguvat abg va gur znva pyhr frtzrag rnpu ebhaq gurer'f n rkgen ehyr rapbqrq gb znxr vg rnfvre sbe lbh

Assumptions made off of the rules are sketchy so dont use anything not in the main clue segment each round there's a extra rule encoded to make it easier for you
wait lol im stupid its a rot 13 caeser shift. Also why is a a apostrophe included in there's but all other punctuation is omitted?

I think the sassy was trying to mislead people with their fake bad grammar, since other sassies *ahem* you *ahem* have typed like that.