Save the person on top of you!

[aim4me26]

You think you died, but you actually didn't, because I save you!

But then, I almost get run over by a car..

[pikachu4919]

but then I push you out of the car's way!

but then my leg gets run over by the car ...

[A Person]

With me pushing them under! But I don't!

But I'm in the path of a truck.

[ThePrudentGuava]

which I hit w/ my van

now my van is on fire

[pikachu4919]

then I grab a nearby fire extinguisher and put out the fire!

but then angry firefighters approach because I stole their "hero moment"

[ThePrudentGuava]

but then they (ironically) spontaneously combust

But then the media chases you for a comment on the story of the firefighters

[2000lby]

then I come and give the lamest quotes so they all leave.

but then I walk past advertisements for the next generation Pokemon games and slip on a banana peel.

[ajohn]

then, a gyrados jumped out of the advertisement and saved you, but then an electrabuzz zapped it and you fell, with the ground rushing toward you very fast...

[pikachu4919]

then Pidgeotto also flies out of the advertisement and flies you away from the battling Electabuzz and Gyrados! but it looks really hungry with you being the only available food source ...

[49ers]

So I quickly reach into my bag and throw him some Berries. Then I realize, we need food because we haven't eaten in a while... like in the last few hundred posts (I am guessing)